"If you know someone who has lost a child, and you're afraid to mention them because you think you might make them sad by reminding them that they died--you're not reminding them. They didn't forget they died. What you're reminding them of is that you remembered that they lived, and that is a great gift." ~Elizabeth Edwards~
Someone posted this quote on BBC and it touched me so much that I had to blog about it. It's one of the truest things I have heard since losing Giovanna. I'm unsure how anyone could forget that I had a baby, if you were around me at all you know that I was pregnant for 9 months, it wasn't like you could miss it or me whining about it. Yet so many people choose to act like nothing happened. I'm not stupid, I know its awkward to talk about and I'll be the first person to admit that I wouldn't know what to say to someone who lost their baby. But choosing to act like nothing happened doesn't make it go away, she wasn't the red headed stepchild, she was our baby girl love and wanted by us! When you say her name or ask me details, your not reminding me my baby died, that is something that I will never forget as long as I live. Yeah sometimes it makes me sad but that's ok, I also get great joy out of talking about her. She will always be a part of me, she's my daughter and its ok to be sad sometimes but I don't want her short life to be all about sadness. Sometimes I have no other choice but to laugh when I say something about when I was pregnant with Giovanna and people give me a look of terror....HELLO, if she had lived it would ok to talk about, right? Why is baby loss such a taboo subject, its painful, it sucks, its one of the worst things that a parent could have to go through but it happens more then any of us wish. I've been thinking a lot about next October 15, National Pregnancy and Infant Loss day, I figure if I start now by then I will have some sort of ceremony or walk planned. I want to honor all babies lost in pregnancy or as a infant. I want to talk about this taboo subject for just one day, not to scare people or to make them sad, just to remember out loud bc us moms never forget and hearing your babies name spoken feels so good. So if your a fellow baby loss survivor please post your info on my guest page or email your angels name, I want to include them.