Today's the day the 14th of the month...Giovanna would be 14 months old today! I find it so hard to believe that 14 months has passed..I know I say that every month but it seems like time just flies by. I don't think that the 14th of a month will ever pass with out me thinking about my baby girl...not a day goes by that I don;t think about her. I think back to when I was little how long a week seemed so long now the weeks go by so fast. I didn't realize until Gabriella got here how 'out of practice' I was with a baby, I can't help but think I shouldn't be, I just had a baby last year, I should know what I'm doing. I guess by now I'm a pro at pregnancy...being pregnant for 20 months out of the last 24 will do that to you...and I'm finally getting back into the swing of taking care of a baby again. I wonder everyday how different my life would be now if Giovanna had lived. I wish I could go back to her birthday just to hold her again. I can't help but wonder what she would have been like. Having Gabriella here has reaffirmed that my older children would have loved her to pieces...I'm sure she would have been spoiled rotten. It's odd, while it is a comfort to have a new baby to hold' it also makes me miss Giovanna even more...I truly realize all the time I didn't get to spend with her and memories I didn't get to make. I know that I will probably never know why I lost my baby girl...why I was chosen to be her mother for such a short time. What I do know though is no matter how short the time was that I spent with her I will hold her in my heart forever. I love and miss you baby girl!