18 months

I wonder if I will ever stop counting the days and months since Giovanna was born..if she lived she would have been 18 months old, a year and a half. I can't even imagine, I'm sure she would be walking and talking trying to keep up with her brothers and sister and probably starting to get into their stuff. I can't help but find myself thinking what my life would be like with two babies. I'm beginning to realize that 2 years will be here before I know it. The pain isn't going away, it's getting easier to live with but I still think about Giovanna every day...some days I wish I didn't have to carry this burden that I could just be a mom whose baby didn't die. I realize though for some reason one I may never know God choose me to be Giovanna's mom. I feel like I write the same things every month, I'm trying not to dwell in my pain I go on because I have to but I miss my little girl so much. I love you baby girl!