Today is Easter...it should have been Giovanna's 1st Easter, I shouldn't say it should have been, it was. Only she didn't spend it here with us, she spent it in heaven with Jesus. I've been in a bad mood all day, it took awhile before I realized (after I yelled at Nick b/c he brought me the wrong pan) it was because I miss my baby girl, I miss the memories we didn't get to make with her. I miss the fact that she's not here to enjoy all the traditions we have. I know she would be getting to the age where she would start to notice what goes on around her, maybe she would even be trying to crawl. I think she probably would have gotten a laugh out of the kids this morning. I try not to be sad when I think that this is the day that Christ was risen...that alone gives me great hope in seeing my baby girl again. I think about the pain that Christ endured and how Mary probably felt helplessly watching her son die for our sins, it makes me grateful for the life I have been given. I try to  count my blessings, be thankful for what I have and not dwell on what I don't but that doesn't make the pain of missing Giovanna any less, she's never far from my mind. I love my baby girl and look forward to the day I can hold her in my arms again. Happy Easter baby girl...mommy loves you!